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So-HeeLeeThis paper aims to explore the first-person narrator Hata's gendered trauma related to Kkutaeh in Chang-rae Lee's skillful writing in A Gesture Life.Hata's gendered trauma functions as an alternative form of memory and history. As a disruption of nationally oriented referential history, Hata's traumatic narrative orchestrates the production of a historiography that exposes the workings of gender and race as a kind of repression. While insisting that he had loved Kkutaeh, Hata's traumatic narrative illustrates his masculine desire to possess her sex and dominate her sexuality. Hata's shortening of Kkutaeh K in his first-person narrative throughout the novel implies his desire to disarticulate their shared ethnic and national heritages and his desire to hide the strong identification with K, which clearly reflects Hata's gendered trauma. In short, Hata's gendered trauma in Chang-rae Lee's A Gesture Life reflects one of the examples of the abjection of Asian women typical of much Asian American fiction by male authors, because Asian American male writers abject the Asian women as a response to their own abjection as racialized others in the main stream America.